The Girl Needs a Break

Madison has one more week of 2nd grade. Her goal for the summer is to complete her school's 4th grade math curriculum. You have no idea how freaked out I am by this. In fact if you know math I am willing to trade you knitted goods for tutoring. I told her how hard it would be. I told her she would have to take math on vacation. I told her there would be times when she would want to stop and play, but she would not be swayed.

So this morning when she said, "Mom. I really don't have anything important to do at school today so I don't want to go. I'm not going to lie, I just want a break." I said, "Okay. Stay home."

I wasn't able to capture her shock on camera but it looked something like this.

Without the soda, of course.

Now you might say it is awfully coincidental that she needs a break the day we get a really fun new game . . . I say, she's eight, lay off.

The Last Box

I did something bad this morning. I weighed myself. Don't worry, I don't plan on doing it again anytime soon.

I am going to Costco this morning to buy my last box of Chase sized diapers. I have decided I'm done, this is it, he WILL be potty trained! To top it off I haven't showered, which means I'm bound to run into someone I haven't seen in a long time. Probably on old boyfriend.

There's a Spoon in My Wall

I like to watch nerdy shows. Some of the nerdy shows I enjoy most are Mythbusters, Cash Cab, and Antiques Road Show. Last night I spent an hour watching a documentary on synchronized swimming-- I'll save that for another blog.

I also like to watch History Detectives and This Old House. For a while I was even a little obsessed with History Detectives. Once I thought about skipping church to watch a History Detective marathon. I went to church, but I made Michael tape it and spent the next two weeks watching episodes in bed at night.

Back when we had cable I watched a show that combined the two-- it was awesome. Unfortunately, I have forgotten what it was called, or what channel it was on. TLC maybe?

Anyway, they would go to old homes and discover the history behind the house. Fantastically exciting? Oh, I know. I would have totally skipped church to watch a marathon of that. Sadly that opportunity never arose.

In this show the owner inevitably found random things in the walls while restoring or remodeling the home. They would find shoes, shirts, money, toys, knives, guns . . . you name it.

I always wondered how the devil these things got in the wall! It never made sense to me. But see, I don't think I had as many kids then. Now we have 2 or 3 dollars worth of change in our bedroom door, and then
yesterday Davis found this. He also found that it gives you direct access to the inside of the wall! Among other things (crayons, pencils, erasers) there is now a spoon in my wall.

If I see him trying to stuff one of my shirts in there, I'm going to be really mad.

This is Summer

The boy is out for the summer. Madison still has two weeks of school which she is not very happy about. She's going to be even less happy when she hears that Chase's last day of preschool is tomorrow. I can hear it now, "Everyone is out BUT ME?!"

Because Chase has school this morning I figured Davis and I could spend some quality time with the boy. We started by going to the library. As I was pushing the stroller down the ramp I was stopped by an older woman who, in a very thick Russian accent, said "Both boys? Congratulations! You strong mother. Boys good." Nothing like starting the day with a strange compliment.

While at the library I was hoping to find a book that would encourage Kai to read this summer. I showed him, "The Diary of a Killer Cat." It had animals and death in the title, how could I go wrong? "Um okay, but do you think I could get a book about multiplication?"

After we checked out our books I handed him one to read in the car. It was called, "First Grade Stinks." "Mom, the thing is, I don't really think first grade stinks, so could I just read the book about multiplication?" The whole way home I listened to, "Hey! Did you know 10 times 12 is 120?" and "1 times 1 is 1? What! I thought it was 2 . . . no wait, that adding."

I'm going to have to contact the hospital, no way is that child mine.

Funeral or Happy Hour?

Friday we went to a funeral. It was a nice funeral, but I didn't like it. No one likes funerals. After the funeral we attended the family luncheon that was held in the cultural hall. As we were finishing the wife of the deceased got up to express her appreciation for the people who came, helped, brought flowers, etc. Before she sat down again she briefly bore her testimony. It made everyone want to run up and give her a hug. Well almost everyone. I heard a sigh next to me, and turned to see Kai, with his little hand out to the side, and a look of confusion on his face. "Why is she telling me that? I already know the church is true-- they tell me all the time in primary!"

I have decided that I'm not going to have a funeral. I'm going to have one last stitch and bitch, with Dublin Dr. Pepper on tap and an unlimited supply of chocolate. If you don't know how to knit, you better like chocolate.

S'nB

Yesterday I went to my first S'nB. For the uninitiated that stands for Stitch and Bitch. We did a lot of stitching, but very little bitching. We were knitting (and crocheting) with out distraction-- what could we possibly complain about?

I met this lovely group of ladies on Ravelry. If you are a knitter or crocheter who has not joined Ravelry, I suggest you do so as soon as possible.

T-Ball

I love T-Ball.

In T-Ball all the kids get to hit the ball every inning, even if it takes them a few swings to do it. Once they have all hit the inning is over.

Everyone gets to run around the bases. When one of them is "technically" out (which has yet to happen) they still stay on base.

It often takes the little kids a while to get the ball after it has been hit. During this time the runner goes crazy. The kids are always stealing bases and hitting home runs. Nothing is better than seeing a 5 year old beam after hitting a home run.

Because no one keeps score you can cheer for both teams.

The best part? Each team only gets two innings. Before you know it the game is over and you're off eat lunch.

Hair Cut

BEFORE

AFTER

A Weeks Worth

Monday I took Davis to the doctor for a weight check. This was not very fun.

Tuesday Madison fell off the monkey bars at school and hurt her foot. I wasn't there, but I can't imagine it was fun.

Wednesday I took Madison to the doctor to look at her foot. I also took her to the hospital for an x-ray. This took forever. We were stuck in construction traffic, it was hot, and not very fun.

Thursday I took Davis to the doctor because he had a high fever and I suspected he had an ear infection. Was this trip to the doctor fun? No. Strange? To say the least.

Thursday is the other doctor's day. We rarely see this doctor. In fact we have tried to avoid him ever since he rubbed Michael's back and said, "Lets hope Madison sleeps better tonight, Daddy."

So yesterday I found myself in a small room with four kids waiting for the doctor to check Davis's ears. While we were waiting Chase kept going into the corner right behind the door in order to hold nonsensical conversations with a grover who is painted on the wall. Kai was wired--really wired. Davis was sick, crying, and generally pathetic. Madison was quietly knitting-- I love that girl.

The doctor slowly opened the door and said he thought he heard someone talking behind it. It was Chase and Grover. As soon as the doctor saw Chase he put his hands together as if to pray, then bowed. Chase ignored him and went back to his conversation with Grover. The doctor turned and told me he thought Chase was growing into a beautiful little girl who spoke very well for how long she'd been here. I figured if he was impressed with Chase's 3 year old English he'd be really impressed with how well Davis is doing--only 11 months and saying "da da." His accent is spot on too.

He sat down to look at Davis and said, "It's Davis right?" I shook my head. "Well David let's look in your ears." He looked in Davis's ears then looked at me. "Her ears are beautiful. " In less than a minute he went from Davis to David to Her. Perhaps I should stop putting the little boys in dresses.

Before we left he gave each of the kids a new box of crayons. Chase immediately ripped the box open and sent 24 crayons flying around the office. As Madison and the P.A. scrambled to pick them up the doctor turned to me and said, "You wanna know something funny about those crayons? They're made in China."

Completed!

Yesterday, I finished the sweater I was working on. It worked out well enough that I plan on making more. I still need to put buttons on, but you get the idea.

Life's Little Moments

The following is a conversation Madison and I had while waiting at the hospital to x-ray her foot

Madison: What does DOB: 5/4/00 mean?
Me: DOB stands for Date of Birth, then it list the date you were born.
Madison: What does the 00 mean?
Me: 2000, the year you were born.
Madison: How do they know it doesn't stand for 1000?
Me: Because if you were born in the year 1000 you'd be dead. In other words, not waiting for an x-ray and asking random questions.
Madison: Oh. Well, how do they know it doesn't stand for 3000?
Me: Because that hasn't happened yet.
Madison: Oh ya. I'm bored.

Me? Naked? I Don't Think So.

This morning I got three messages from three separate senders that were titled "I caught you naked! Watch!" Um, no thank you! The last thing I want to see is myself naked! Do they know how long it's been since I've gone to the gym?

A Little Humor

Passing on the Addiction

This is my dad with his first coke.

This is my dad giving Davis his first coke.

The Tooth

I have been meaning to post about this for almost two months now. On the 15th of this month Davis will be 11 months old. Nearly two months ago (when he was 9 months) he got his first tooth. It is still the only tooth he has so I have taken up calling him snaggletooth. Madison got her first teeth around 13 months and Kai got his around 11 months. Each of our children is closer and closer to the norm. This is why we aren't having any more. What would I blog about if my children were normal.

Not Again . . .

As I was driving home from taking the kids to school this morning 5 or 6 robins flew in front of my car. One of them landed right in front of my tire. There was a noticeable bump. I think the bird I took out this morning was suicidal. Still it seems very unfair to make me the unwilling participant in his death wish.

Random Thoughts

This morning after Michael left for work the boy started responding to everything I said with, "co ten tack oh no chi wa." I have put a lot of thought into it and believe he is trying to say, "guten tag , konnichi wa." Why? I have no idea.

I have two bits of very sad news to report.

Bit number 1: Jason's Deli no longer carries Dublin Dr Pepper. Apparently carrying Dublin Dr Pepper broke the contract they had with Coke. This make no sense to me. I thought Dr Pepper was its own thing and not a Coke or Pepsi product. I have also been told that Dr Pepper is now a part of Pepsi. Either way I'm confused. I realize that being a Dr Pepper enthusiast I should know these things, but I don't study its history, I just drink it.

Bit number 2: A very large quail flew into my kitchen window and died the other day. It was very sad and I feel responsible. Jessie and I took the curtains down when we painted. I haven't put them back up yet because I want to spray paint the rod black before I put them back up-- which I haven't done yet. I do realize we are talking about a bird who prefers walking to flying even though God gave it wings. But don't you just love seeing the baby quail crossing the street all in a row like little ducks?

Lastly, my progress on the sweater I'm making. Someone asked me the other day when I was going to start knitting real things, not just baby clothes. I've been thinking more and more about it. It's probably time. I'll add something to the queue.

Just Do It

If you haven't already, go and read my sister-in-law's post at Segullah. So go already!

History of My Housewifery

My Secret Admirer

Last night around 2am I got one of my few truly anonymous comments. And I’m so proud I’m going to share it with you.

Wow! You're just...like...so edgy and original and cool and rebellious and anti-establishment!

And yet...uhhh...you named your kid....ummm...wait for it... 'Madison'...lol. Why not 'Dakota' or 'Savannah'?

. . . . You can find the rest of the comment here.

Just a few weeks ago one of my neighbors told me I was hip, and now some anonymous admirer is telling me I’m edgy and original! Imagine that! Hip, edgy and original! Now I can die happy.

At first I disagreed with the “rebellious and anti-establishment” part, but then got to thinking and realized, “hey this person might be right! I’m really am rebellious and anti-establishment!” So for all of you who think I’m not here are two reasons you are wrong

1. I signed the girl up for soccer. I know that doesn’t seem rebellious, but at each soccer game I made the girl wear the other team's jersey color. Sure it was a little confusing, but I enjoyed its pure rebellious awesomeness!

2. I plan on voting for Ron Paul. I don’t really know anything about him or his campaign, but I love to say, “Ron Paul REVO LUUUTION!” Just try and tell me that isn’t anti-establishment.

My admirer goes on to ask a compelling question, why did I name the girl Madison? Why not Dakota or Savannah? Well, I wanted to name her Darcy or Jane, you know, something really edgy. But the husband said that was just too over the top for him. We compromised by naming her Madison, but in order to edge it up a bit, we spelled it Mad666ison. The 666 is silent.

At this point my admirer goes on to use the “b” word. My friends and family frequent this blog (I did put it up for them after all) and because they aren’t used to that kind of foul language, I didn't want to quote the whole comment in this post.

However, in the end my admirer says, "Shame you had to inflict your bitterness on another innocent generation. But I guess that's your 'right'."

I assume the commenter is referring to my children. But then said commenter did use the word "innocent" so maybe not. Did s/he see this picture of the boy I posted on the sidebar?

That aside, I'm going to have to defer to my two law friends on this one. So, Smash . . . Marc . . . is it my right to inflict bitterness on an innocent generation? Because if it is I've got to get going, I'm wasting time as we speak!

Thanks for the comment! Love you all!

Home-During-The-Prom-Girl (aka Beth)

Madison is Eight

Madison turned eight on Sunday. I was hoping to have my desktop set up by now so I could post pictures of her when she was born, but I suppose that will have to wait until next year. Instead I will tell you one of my favorite Madison stories.

On her first day of kindergarten the little boy who sat next to her asked, "Hey, did you know you have a pin head?" "No." She said. "Well you do." he said. On her second day of kindergarten the same little boy asked her again, "Hey, did you know you have a pin head?" She was exasperated and replied, "Yes! I know! You told me that yesterday! Don't you Remember?"

Which One?

Friday was the Mother Goose Fair at the boy's school. I got there 20 minutes early. I like to tell people I got there early so I could help set up, but really I was just afraid I wouldn't be able to find a parking spot. When I arrived the kids were at lunch, so I did help the teacher set up a little. When the kids started trickling in I sat down with the two little boys to wait for the show.

Because I was the only parent who had arrived, all the kids began crowding me. "Who's mom are you?" "Is that your baby?" The boy quickly established me as his mother and the two little boys as his brothers.

One girl came up to the baby, turned to Kai, and said, "This is your brother? Oh! He looks just like you, Kai!" I was a little surprised because I don't think Davis looks anything like Kai. Then she turned to Chase and said, "Oh! Is he your brother too? Wow! He look just like you too!" I laughed.

It reminded me of a time when I ran into an acquaintance, she pointed at Chase and said, "Okay . . . so I know he's yours, but who do the others belong to?" To be fair, up until then she had only ever seen me with Chase and assumed my husband was Asian. I found it humorous all the same.

But wait, it gets better . . . after the first girl said Chase looks just like Kai, another little girl came up. She patted Davis on the head and said, "Hey Kai! Whaddya name this one?" He told her his name was Davis. "Oh," she said, "and whaddya name the little black one?"

If nothing else Chase's life should be interesting.

Embossed Wall Follow-Up

As requested I am putting up pictures of the embossed wall from a distance.

Ignore the fact that we are obviously not finished with our kitchen make-over. We still need to put up the black bead board. I also am not sold on the yellow yet. The color we ended up with turned out to be more yellow and less green than I wanted. But, I'm waiting to see what the yellow looks like with the bead board before I paint over it.

Back to the reason I put up the picture . . . if you were looking at the wall from this distance in real life you would barely be able to make out the embossing. You can't see it at all in the picture.


From this closer distance, the picture barely shows the embossing. However, I think you can see it pretty well from this distance in real life.

DIY: Embossed Wall

DIY: The Embossed Wall

As you know this week Jessie and I were busy working on the kitchen. We did a lot of painting and something a friend taught me. I like to call it wall embossing. Don't know how to emboss a wall? Well, today is your lucky day!

You will need: Stencils, craft knife, pencil, putty knife, painters tape, paint rollers, paint brushes, paint, and dry time spackle.

Pick a Pattern. First off, you need to decide what you are going to emboss on your walls. We picked maple leaves. But be creative, you can use a fleur-de-lis, a daisy, or a bird. Doing a child's room? How about cars, trucks, stars, or fairies?

Get a Stencil. After you have chosen a pattern you need to find a stencil. If you can't find exactly what you are looking for, it is easy to create your own. Simply trace your pattern onto a blank stencil sheet and cut it out with a craft knife. We cut out four maple leaves in various sizes.

Prepare the walls. We will be spackling and painting so give the walls a quick wash and remove any wall plates that might get hit with the roller. Don't tape off yet! If you put the tape on too early, it is harder to remove when you are done.

Outline. Take a pencil and lightly mark where you are going to be stenciling. We wanted the leaves to be placed on our wall in a tree branch pattern and drew lines accordingly. If you want your pattern to be placed on the wall at specific intervals, make sure to mark it off. Depending on how precise you want your pattern to be, you may want to use a ruler and a level.

Spackle Your Design. Grab your putty knife, it's time to spackle! We suggest using dry time indicator spackling. It goes on pink and dries white. The pink color makes it easier to see the design as you're putting it on.

Firmly hold the stencil in place, using your putty knife spread the spackle across the stencil. It works best to spread from the outside of the stencil in. If you want a more worn or rustic look, you can try filling in only part of the stencil. Have fun with this part! If you don't like it, scrape it off and try again.

Let it Dry. While your spackling dries, use painters tape to tape off any door jams, baseboards, ceilings or walls you don't want to get paint on.

Sand. Once the spackle designs are completely dry you will want to sand them. At this point the spackle is still fragile, so use a fine grit sand paper. Sand just enough to get rid of any sharp edges. You will want to leave some of the texture, as it adds to the look.

Paint. Now it is time to paint your walls. Make sure to use a primer if needed. If you find that your spackling is coming off during the painting process, spray it with a little varnish first. Remember to remove the painters tape while the paint is slightly tacky. Don't wait too long or you'll be needing that craft knife to remove it.

Details. Once the paint is dry, feel free to highlight your embossing with little bit of color. You can do this by rubbing a small amount of paint onto the embossed area, then wiping it off with a dry rag. However, don't go overboard, the embossing should be subtle.

The Black Sheep

Today is the Mother Goose fair in the boy's class. Each student is supposed to recite a Mother Goose poem in front of the class, while the parents watch. The boy decided to recite "Ba Ba Black Sheep."

Because it's Free Dress Friday they are allowed to come in costume. I used black felt and cotton balls to make ears and used hot glue to attach them to a headband. He was very impressed. He wore the ears most of yesterday and declared, "it's okay for boys to wear headbands if they have ears on them!" He thinks I'm a brilliant costume maker, I'll be sad when he is older and I no longer hear him gush over little things like felt sheep ears.

Meet Jessie and Jens

This is Jessie and Jens. Jessie drove all the way from Las Vegas to help me paint my kitchen. What's more she drove all that way with two little girls. Why would Jessie drive all that way, just to help me paint a kitchen? Maybe she's a bit touched or maybe it was one of these reasons

Reason #1: She didn't want to miss seeing the huge nail in our wall. This nail was fat and long and refused to budge. We tried pulling it out and hammering it in. Michael finally just cut it off (see Michael doing just that in the previous post).

Reason #2: She wanted to see how cute Chase is when he gets on the bus. Hopefully this wasn't the reason. If it was, her drive will have been for naught because Chase missed the bus. There is a 20 minutes window of time we have to watch for the bus. The bus happened to come during the 1 minute I ran to the garage. So I drove Chase to school and handed him off to a woman who claimed to be his teacher, and hoped against hope that he made it home in the afternoon. He did by the way. Whew!

Reason #3: She was anxious to show off her ability to talk her way out of a parking ticket. I was just as anxious to see this ability as she was to show it off-- so when she asked if I thought it was okay for her to park pointing the wrong way in front of my house I said, "Sure it is!" She was a quick talker too. He changed it from a ticket to a warning. What a nice guy!

Reason #4: She wanted to figure out what crazy thing I was going to be doing to my walls. Not only did I tell her but I forced her to participate. So what do you think?