My Five Dollars

Last August the boy went in for an endoscopy.  Around November we started receiving the associated claims statements and bills.  I checked them and Mike paid them.  Its a good system for us.  

In December I got the first call from University Health Care.  They wanted to know when I planned on paying the 55 dollars I owed them and asked if they could help me set up a payment plan.  Fairly certain we'd payed the bill I told them I'd look into it and call them back.  Mike looked it up and sure enough we'd payed (using bill pay) and they had cashed the check.

I called and told them they had made a mistake and explained that they had cashed our check.  Over the next three months we were given two reasons for why they had no idea where our money was

1.  We sent it to the right place but the account number we gave them was wrong.  Even though they know the number we gave them they still can't find the money.

2.  We gave them the right account number but we sent it to the wrong division of University Health Care, and even though they know what division we sent it to they can't find the money.

At one point one of the women I talked to said, "Why don't you just pay us again?  When the account that has your money figures out it isn't theirs, they'll send you a refund."  Seeing as how they lost the first 55 dollars, I told her once I had received the refund I'd happily pay again.  She said "fine" and told me she'd find it and call me back.

However, instead of calling me back she sent me a notice in the mail saying that if I didn't pay them 55 dollars in the next two weeks they would send me to collections.

I called them again.  This time I was told they knew I had paid and they even knew the account where the money was deposited,  but it was the wrong account and they can't find the exact check so they can't credit me for the money.  I was told that the only way to prevent my account from going to collections was if I faxed them a copy of the cashed check.  It was the ONLY way they could find the money.  I said that was fine, but they would have to pay me the 5 dollars it was going to cost to get a copy of the check.  

Her:  "uh, we don't really do that."    

Me:  "but it isn't my fault you lost the money.  Why should I pay 5 dollars so you can figure out your mistake?"

Her:  "well, get the check and fax it to me and I'll see what I can do."

So I did.  I paid 5 dollars for a copy of the check and I faxed it to them.  They called me two weeks later.

Her:  "Um, We were wondering when you were going to be able to pay us the 55 dollars you owe us."

Me:  "You have GOT to be kidding me!  I don't have time to argue with you about this right now.  I faxed you a copy of the check proving that I paid and proving that you cashed it.  In fact you owe ME 5 dollars, now go look it up and call me back."

She never called back.  Instead I got a letter in the mail from the collections agency saying I'd been sent to collections and I had 30 days to refute their claim.  I called immediately, and faxed the collections agency everything I had sent to University Health Care.  I sent them a copy of the bill, a copy bill pay receipt, and a copy of the cashed check.  The lady at collections actually said, "I can't believe they are doing this to you!" She said she'd show her boss but was pretty confident they wouldn't continue the claim.

I called University Health Care again.  At this point I was mad.  I told the woman on the phone that if they didn't send me a check for 5$ I'd take them to small claims court, and if they didn't clear my account and my credit was affected I'd hire a lawyer and sue them.  

Her: "Let me look into this.  I'll call you back."  

Me: "Really?  Because everyone I've talked to in the last 3 months has said, 'let me look into this.  I'll call you back' and 'don't worry, I'll fix this, and then I'll call you back' but they NEVER do."

Her: "I will I promise."

Ten minutes later she called me back.

Her: "I've talked to my superiors and they said to go ahead and clear your account so you don't owe us anything, and I've cancelled the collections order too."

Me:  "Right, because I don't owe you any money.  And what about my 5 dollars?"

Her:  "Yeah, they said they'd have it to you in 3 weeks."

Me:  "Okay, but if it isn't here in 3 weeks, I'm filing."

Her: "I don't doubt that. And I'm sorry."

Me:  "Yeah, but I'm still really mad."

Her:  "I know."

The check arrived and my mom said, "Too bad, small claims court would have been fun."  Instead of enjoying small claims court, my mom and I going to use my five dollars to subsidize lunch.